Monday 23 September 2024

The TradDad must make a come back

I have been watching this Mahabharata between the retired army officers and the serving police personnel. Now, both the parties,  equally important for the society and the country are at war. You see allegations, half-truths, biased opinions and legal wrangles showing no sign of waning. Anyone who is anybody is giving his two cents on the matter after seeing some clip from some source. We also know how a media reportage or an FIR can be designed to grind personal, and political axes.

Where will it end what will be the conciliation or adjudication process to deescalate the matter and penalise the errant party? What are the face savers? And who has that neutrality and social standing to get it done? I don't know.

But I know one thing for sure. The sequence of events offered dozens of opportunities at every stage to break the chain reactions the consequences of which we are suffering. This Mahabharata was preventable at its origins.

Anyone who has seen the videos would pity and question the retired Brigadier father and the serving Major fiancee about their role in playing mute spectators while the thing was incrementally slipping out of hand. Why were they so helpless? Respect for women? Really?

Dear men, when you raise a family and empower your women, be it your wife or daughter, tell them that we must behave according to the situation, ensuring our safety and minimising our risks are our responsibilities. Also tell them that if they declare 'Tu jaanta nahin mein kaun hun', their men and the state are not on a hotline to rescue them when they get drunk, provoke a brawl, and incite potential threats to show their true colors.

A gentleman is not the right man in such a crisis. These men in question could have acted tough, restrained their woman and saved the situation from spiralling into a major crisis.

Be a man to tell your woman when to stop, be that traditional dad and tell your daughter what to wear where, when to drink, where to smoke and when not to. That you have to behave appropriately if you expect respect. Ask them to follow without questioning or seeking its justification. They have to do it because you asked them to do it. Just that. 

You may not get the support of the lady of the house but still do it.

You are risking earning the tag of being an orthodox, a chauvinist and a medieval man. Earn it. Wear it like a crown of thorns. But enforce certain code of behaviours both for your son, and daughter. Empowerment doesn't give anyone the right to be disrespectful. Freedom doesn't mean anarchy.

The traditional dad (TradDad) must make a comeback if we want a safe society both for men and women. The last thing we want to see is the police and army fighting because of a few extra pegs.

This is my belated Daughter's Day thought.

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